When does wank not become worth it?

Fandom's always been fun for me, ever since I got into "Trek" back in college. Never had a bad experience in it (well, excepting that incident with the stalker of an actor on a Groups list I was on a few years ago, but everyone agreed that was ONE crazy chick and the mod booted her so we wouldn't go down with her when the cops caught up with her scary habits). Everyone lusted and debated and carried on, but it never became personal or accusatory - and this is coming from a dedicated NoRoMo in the X-Files fandom (meaning, those of us who didn't want Mulder and Scully to get together onscreen).

Meanwhile, in the past few days, I've been alternately accused of ruining POTC fandom for J/E fans and of not loving Will Turner enough in my comments.

*thinks*

On the other hand ... you gotta admit, I'm terribly egalitarian if these are both true. *G*

But when does enjoying something become more of a chore than a pleasure? When does using it to bleed off steam from real life and sharpen one's acuity become a burden? I wonder if I'm close to that.