No, I do NOT need to write an AU AWE where Will and Lizzie aren't married or involved and the chest ends up with a certain doe-eyed pirate lord searching for Aqua de Vida.
Um ... personal experience suggests to me that what you need bears no relation to what will actually happen where fic is concerned! Besides, how can you possibly resist that knee-nuzzling charmer and his doe-eyed bad boy pirate?

*discreetly feeds the bunny when you're not looking*